Sometimes I find myself talking way too much and I am a pretty emotional person. I would really like to tone down my emotions - instead of reacting first and thinking later; thinking first and then reacting. How can I go about making these changes and actually sticking to it?
How do you make changes to your personality?
Get to know yourself through meditation. The 4th step of the 12 Step Program say %26quot;Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.%26quot; Just an inventory, good points, so-so points, and the bad points you want to change. Then don't keep it to yourself, share it with a friend. This helps with your commitment to make necessary changes. Begin with one thing, don't try to work on too much at a time as it will seem overwhelming. Ben Franklin wrote that he would pick one thing he wanted to change and he would practice the new way for a month, then two if needed. Then he would move to the next.
My biggest personal challenge was the self-talk in my head. Daniel Amen (of Change Your Brain fame) refers to ANTS - Automatic Negative Thoughts. My ANTS were headed by Bad, Wrong, Stupid. Plus an attitude of superiority covering a belief in my inferiority. I once referred to myself as an arrogant doormat! The phrase just slipped out. A benefit of sharing with others.
It eventually became a habit to challenge each thought as it came up. I also learned that often I could not rely on my feelings. They actually lied! I needed a reality check and fortunately I had friends I could call for that.
I wish you well
How do you make changes to your personality?
Hoo boy, I don't know! If you find out let me know. lol
I guess it's just a matter of forcing yourself to change. Find a really good reason to change and memorize it. Find some ways to remind yourself. Notecards, maybe, left in strategic places so you'll see them and remember that you are going to chill out more. Or a piece of jewelry that you wear every day to remind you of your decision, sorta like a promise ring. I dunno. Sticking with it is hard....I have learned, through trial and much error, that I'm the only one who can make me stick to a decision. Nobody else can enforce it for me. I have to be disciplined enough to do it myself. It's not easy.If I don't man up and do it, it doesn't get done. But if you're willing to fall down and get back up a bunch of times, eventually you'll stop falling down.
you have to make a commitment and stick to it ...no matter how long it take, every time you catch your self engaging in the behavior you want to change, stop and correct it, every time, eventually you'll start doing the desired behavior first... you are on a good path because you recognize the problem, you do not have to fight through denial and other barriers to attack problem...
